I’m the new cucumber

 

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I was always getting flustered when things weren't going smoothly.

If there was a new patient.

Change in plans.

New orders from the doctor.

My blood pressure spiked along with it.

Every day I was drowning.

Just a sea of anxiety over things I couldn't control.

Going to work was mentally painful.

I was always wondering when the next change of course would derail my train of neatly stacked trays of dental instruments.

"I need to figure out how to escape this anxiety spiral..."

That's all I could think.

Then I saw her.

My coworker.

Floating pass me with not a care in the world.

Like she was gliding over a newly polished granite countertop.

Like she didn't know what "stressed" meant.

Like time was her lackey.

And before you know it, I had a new goal.

I wanted to be like her.

But how?

Then I asked myself a good question.

(And in case you didn't know, a good question is the prerequisite to getting a good answer.)

My question was this:

How can I stop being knocked around by everything that's coming at me?

Not too long after the answer came to me.

It was simple.

But as we know, simple isn't always easy.

Which would prove to be true for the following months.

"It's not a problem. It's a fun challenge."

I told myself.

And in the moments I really let that sink in, it was like night and day for my mood.

Before long, I didn't even have to say that out loud to myself anymore.

I didn't even have to pull my protective smock off my wrist to see my permanent bracelet with the words "fun challenge" inscribed.

(Yes, I went that far.)

Because, it had become second nature.

I was swapping overwhelm with cool calm flurries of activity like the freaking Dalai Lama.

Moments would hit me, of course.

When I wasn't fully present.

But I would be back in it quickly.

Now I'm the cool cucumber on the job.

I won't lie and say things don't make me anxious.

But I don't stay there

Because I don't have to.

Who in their right mind would know where the escape button is and not abuse it mercilessly?

Not this girl.

You don't have to stay the victim of tough situations.

Use those situations to hone your mind.

Your mind can take you out of anything.

Believe it enough to make it happen.

Because it can.

That's all for today's letter.

Hope you find the meaning to change your life.

Until next time.

Niquey~