Niquey in Thought

  *          *          * I talked myself out of my dreams.  Seriously. I mean, are we sure we want a personal brand?  Because I’m skeptical.  I… don’t think I want to be famous . Okay, so I never actually wanted to be famous. But what I wanted would have held a high chance of me falling into some level of fame. I’ve decided to limit my success. I am purposefully NOT going to go hard. I’ve thought about it and I literally talked myself out of my hopes and dreams. Go hard or go home? I’m going home. Okay that’s an exaggeration. My ambitions are too crazy to turn off honestly, but maybe I’ll just temper myself. I’m going to go moderate. I’m pulling the crosshairs in from Mt Everest down towards more of a Mt. Olympus. Challenging enough to satisfy my hunger for achievement but saturated enough for me to get lost in the masses. This is absurd to think about when I say it like that But, I mean, think about it. So many peop...

*          *          * Do I live carefree in that I don’t care about anything except to talk to God and flow with life? That can’t be right… What about I live carefree in that I pursue any goal I want because I know God’s got me, and when life says “No,” I say, “Says who?” and keep pushing forward. Of course, we have to caveat with the caveats. “Pursue any goal I want” will be tempered by following God. God will let me know when a goal I want is out of the question. Or rather, my Holy Spirit and intuition will. And should I not listen to that, God will enact other means. I know this because I’ve asked Him for this and believe for this. I’ve said to Him many times to get in my way if I’m going the wrong way, and He has. I won’t say it hasn’t frustrated me. But better to be frustrated now and saved later pain. But back to the exploration. I want to really get down to what it means to “live carefree before God” as the Message translatio...

*      *      * It’s a fun challenge. I keep forgetting. It’s a fun challenge! I’m trying to figure out what to do with my life and I keep getting frustrated when I can’t find the answer instead of being curiously open to finding one. Playfully searching. Niquey, remember. It’s all smoke! It’s all going to pass away. My frustrations will not get me closer to the answer; just closer to stress and burnout. Relax! So, I don’t know what I’m doing. This is great! This gives me something to work towards: figure out what I need/want to do. Don’t get frustrated! Don’t waste time fretting about the “feelings” you’re having! Relax! It’s all going away soon. Before you know it, it will be a long-gone memory you will be looking back on and laughing about. Keep your eyes on God. As long as you keep Him involved, Bob Marley’s words will ring true:  Every little thing is gonna be alright! Sooo, I don’t know what I’m doing. What I need to focus on, cut, ignore...

  *      *      * Is it possible to be happy all the time? What if you frame your happiness with the means to success and not in the outcome of success itself? I really think if you seek satisfaction and happiness in an end goal, a singular point in time, one particular outcome, you’ll only get the dopamine hit for a moment. After that, you’ll need to seek more and more “outcomes” to feel happy. While constantly striving to reach some goal is necessary for living a productive and forward moving life, there is something to be said about enjoying each step of the way. My hypothesis is this:  Reframe where you find happiness to be the activity that successful people do (whatever the arena), and your happiness—dopamine hits—will spring forth continuously. For instance, I know that journaling—writing out my thoughts on the epiphanies I get—is an immensely useful habit. Not only will it create clarity, but it will also lead to future content whether in ...